The Fugetives return

I vigorously shake my right hand as my left one cups my quivering lips in an attempt to muffle my screams. It’s funny how I am just as loud during pain as I am during pleasure. Unfortunately, he knew how to trigger both quite efficiently.

The only way I realise how hard I’m shaking is by the aching of my wrist. I don’t hear the clicking; I don’t feel shaking of my body. Everything seems to be in agonizing slow motion and I can’t breathe. 

No matter how much I increase the speed at which I inhale, none of the oxygen seems to reach my veins. I can't breathe. 

I’m slowly suffocating as my heart beat goes from 0 to 100 in 60seconds fuelled by pure hate and disgust.

I feel dizzy and my vision blurs as the sodium chloride in my tears seems to concentrate with every word I read and Every date I see which coincides with a time I was sitting, sipping on black label next to him. My state causes me to magnify every word said to be simultaneous to the greatest level of betrayal. Even the jokes. How dare he joke with her. 

I swear social networking is the devil.

I can almost hear them chuckling and giggling with pleasure. The sound buzzes around my ear like the annoying sound of a fly whirring about a room. 

Only thing is this time it's on the other side of my ear.

I catch one escapee tear with back side of my hand and thank God I wasn't wearing makeup. Thank God the only person home wasn't paying me any mind.

My mind feels woozy. 

Thoughts I thought I'd never have again crossed me...is the chemist still open? 

This pain is definitely killing me, let’s speed it up eh? Hell can’t be that bad anyway.  Hell is obviously playing tsatsa (gamble) with my life. Another point to Lucifer...let’s go congratulate him. Even though I have a feeling when shit hits the fan he’ll get all the recognition needed.

I see names of 'friends' saying things that make my heart split three ways. ewiase nye enika (the world is evil) is all I can think as I contemplate whether I'd rather be the broken hearted girl or the bitch that got hurt n snitches out of spite. I have a reputation to uphold...But who cares. I do. 

So I let it slide, all of it. 

I steady my breath. I wipe the tears. 

I find that the white light has been blinking on my phone. 

Disorientation caused me to ignore it before. As I type in his birthday to unlock my phone I realise I lost this fight long ago. I return to lay my neck in the Guillotine where it belongs and reply to his whatsapp message. My rebellion was short lived, unwitnessed. As i remember how much i love him the shackles snap close around my wrists and ankles. 

I’ll never escape. 

I’ll just wait till he drops this blade, executing me and finally separating my heart from my head.

2012 APPRECIATIONS (Essence B, Twi Teacher, Fokn Bois and more)

Hi guys....

so 2012 is over eh? eiiiih!
well i am glad it is. 2012 was a great year, there was ups and downs i wont lie but it taught me a lot and i'm grateful.
in 2012 i met some great personalities, some became friends, some became enemies but in the end i decided that all is water under the bridge i shal forgive all for their tresspasses.
in terms i've written sad blog posts, happy blog posts some were controversial and some downright bitchy but it's always been me. ive expressed my love for music and poetry on both my blogs respectively and shared my opinions/experiences with several artists from R2bees to the Fokn bois.
its all been a journey to be honest and i appreciate the experience but now ROLL ON 2013!!!!!!! WOOT WOOT!!!

this year is going to be immense as i and the 'crew' have a lot in store...

Firstly, for those that dont know i have recently been promoted by the powers that be at ill mechanix and am as of sometimes last month Managing director of me ye hip hop. so this year i am not only responsible for the  PR of myhh but that and sales and everything in between. in all honesty i was doing all that anyway but having a fancy tag to my name is just cooler lol. but heavy is the head that wears the crown and thus, a lot is expected of me. I plan to make myhh a household name at least in the african community. you'll be seeing myhh on stages adorning ripped abs aswell as on runways hugging sexy curves.
the accessory line should be coming out soon featuring original african orientated snap backs designs by the myhh team themselves including me of course. also a brand isnt a brand until it has had a launch party so watch this space...if you know how i party, you should be looking forward to this.

secondly, those f you who have been following this blog probably know that i started this blogging thing with poetry. that is what i do, i write poetry. its pretty much what keeps me sane.
i was recently approached by an old friend of mine to publish some of my work in a book and i jumped on the opportunity (i didnt really jump. it took ALOT of cursing and shoving). the book will be an anthology of poems relating to my life experiences. there's quite a variety of subjects from love and it's heartbreaks to me dealing with insecurities as a girl and also trying to find my identity and faith. there will be about 30 odd poems and the digital version of the book (working title 'unclothed') is due to be released early spring 2013 with hard copies being released later on this year maybe. All this is thanks to my essence b so i beg help me say thank you eh! *ghana accent*
another thing to be looking out for is the front cover...there might be a little controversy. you can guess from the title ;)

this year i am open to working with anyone, famous or not, on any of my projects so if any of plans sound interesting to you feel free to hook me up but in all honesty considering that my field is PR, i'll be hunting down celebs for endorsements anyway so sit and relax while i stalk you lol.

there are some people who have been a great help to my project so i think this might be a good time to thank them.

In first place would be my chase boys. Joey, Nas and Ivan in particular. working with these guys can be a pain sometimes but its worth it. Joey is the most determined, Nas on the most creative and Ivan the most dedicated person i know. they're like family to me and i love them all to bits MUAH!

Now twi teacher, his originality is inspiring but besides that i want to shout him out for his support for the brand. featuring myhh on his blog is being appreciated ;) and talking of twi teacher, you should check out his website ww.twiteacher.com for everything ghanaian from how to make your nappy hair more bareable to mucatella! Aaaaalso, hes got a new a new video on youtube called 'vim baako' click the link and it'll take you straight there. trust me. its one to watch. "New Video From Twi Teacher (Vim Baako)http://youtu.be/nr0MoOgd3CM 

lastly too, the fokn bois. my collective husbands (only my dreams of course). thanks to them my blog post on sister deborah's video hit record breaking numbers and that deserves appreciation. maybe this year i can finally get both of them to wear one of my shirts, even if i'd rather see em without clothes *sigh*. oh and of course i must thank them for the songs 'my everywhere' and 'beatrice'...for all the obvious reasons ;)

anyway that is it for now guys. i shall update you on any news about myhh and my book. i'm even considering starting a youtube channel and vlogging but we'll see about that. to get a preview on some of the poems that might go into my book check out http://aj-wordsunspoken.blogspot.co.uk/ for my 'classics' ;)